Category Archives: Homeschooling

Auditory Processing

Posted on August 10, 2009 | 3 comments

I’ve been thinking about the whole idea of “auditory processing disorder” and/or “central auditory processing disorder” and how it relates to the right-brained learner. It appears that at least half the people I meet with right-brained learners think their child also has an auditory processing issue. So, as always, I’ve been filtering that thought through all the good information I share about the perspective shift on right-brained learning.

Mass institutions of learning generally teach in a left-brained fashion using a left-brained scope and sequence. The right brained learner has their own preferred scope and sequence, but it is not well known what that looks like. In fact, sometimes I think people are completely unaware that right-brained learners would naturaly have their own scope and sequence. Thus, it is one of my missions in life to share what that scope and sequence looks like, so it can be valued, let alone even recognized.

That said, some people choose to categorize a left-brained learner as “auditory-sequential” and a right-brained learner as “visual-spatial”, based on those attributes being prevalent in the respective learning styles. I don’t like that differentiation because it assumes right-brained people cannot be auditory learners or left-brained people can’t be visual learners. I think these are input modalities: some do well with auditory input, and others do well with visual input. I have six right-brained children and 1 right-brained husband. Four of them do well with auditory input (Weston, Eric, Alex, and Joseph). Three of them do quite poorly (Eli, Adam, and William). It seems they either do very, very well, or very, very poorly as it pertains to auditory input.

So, does that mean my children who do poorly with auditory input mean they have “auditory processing disorder”? It is true that they can barely process any auditory information effectively . . . or do they? I started looking closely, especially as I noticed a few things with myself. I am a strong left-brained learner. My daughter is more whole-brained, but learns in a left-brained manner, and mainly uses her visual skills for creating her fantasy novels. I have noticed lately, when my builder right-brained son, Eli (who doesn’t prefer the auditory input modality), has read things aloud to me from his computer, wanting to ask me a question, I cannot for the life of me process that auditory information without having to get up and go look at the words. My daughter has mentioned that she cannot concentrate on talks at church without doodling or taking notes (a common way for a right-brained learner to attune to left-brained or non-creative tasks).

So, I started thinking about how schools are set up. They are lecture based with note taking. This would go along the lines of how a left-brained person could process auditory information effectively. If they can write or see words (many times, notes were put on the board or on overheads or in outlines as the lecture was given) as they receive the auditory input, they are able to effectively and efficiently process that information. Because a right-brained person’s natural gift is not in words, many times those who do not prefer auditory input cannnot take notes and listen at the same time. However, Eli, who also is a natural at math, he can easily follow a lecture in his math class because the instructor inevitably is working out math problems as she explains. Thus, a visual that makes sense to my son is hooked to the auditory in order that it makes sense to him and can process it effectively. If Eli goes to a class at church where the teacher brings in picture visuals and hands-on activities, he processes the auditory information fine. If they do not, he struggles to pay attention and process the auditory input.

In our instructional world, we tend to use three of our five senses extensively: auditory, visual, and kinesthetic (touch). Smell and taste certainly come into play in such professions as cooking and general environmental assessments. Therefore, I challenge the idea that there are “glitches” in some right-brained learners who do not prefer to process input auditorially. Eli prefers to process visually and kinesthetically. That is 2 of the 3. He can do that third one when paired with one of the other two. I realize I may be similar. I need words involved in order to process auditory information, but because our society is set up to favor the left-brained processing structure, I do not need to figure out creative ways to accomplish the ability to process auditory information.Others buy levitra online cute-n-tiny.com believe that acid reflux is related to aging.

Eli is working out creative ways to accomplish the need to process information auditorially while in college by finding other sources to accomplish the same thing utilizing another of his input modalities. Taking on-line classes is a great option for him in lecture based classes. Because auditory input and words go hand in hand, he can take his time reading and processing the information at a pace that works for him. Yes, he has the option of getting a disability plan in order to tape record his lecture classes, but why? Eli subconsciously resents the idea that he needs to have a “disability plan” when he feels he is quite capable of learning the information if it is presented in a way that works for him. So, isn’t the learning environment “disabled”? It works for certain people, but not for others; yet, if it were structured differently, bringing in all the three input modalities, I think there would be less problems involved with most people. Eli received a high A for his online class for Psychology quite easily. And he really enjoyed the material and talked about what he was learning all the time.

The last thought pertains to processing auditory input from a conversation or if a friend or such is explaining something to you. Then, there is often no visual or kinesthetic hook to the auditory. I asked Eli how he processes our conversations. We have had discussions about the idea that looking at someone tells them you are paying attention. A young person, who attended public school worked for me this summer shadowing my son, William, at a day camp. It was apparent the first time I gave this young man instructions that he had “ADD” as he would not look at me when I spoke, and would not remember half of what I said to him. I asked Eli if it would be easier to not look at me when I spoke in order to process the auditory input more easily. He said it wouldn’t because if he looked off, he might become visually distracted by something and that is when his ears would shut down. I noticed that exact thing happening to this young man who worked for me. I told the young man he needed to come up with some strategies to help him, but he has no tools to pull from, and he has just graduated high school with high grades! After bumping into his mother, she has been concerned that he has relied upon the medication to learn, and after doing a few “placebo experiments” with her son, she has found that he is reliant upon it.

I am grateful for the homeschooling environment. While young, I could center Eli’s learning around his strengths and his preferred input modalities in order to create a strengths based, gift centered learning environment. Once he hit around 11-12 years old, his brain shifted once again (as most people do) in order to start taking in more abstract information, which includes having a greater awareness of what is working and not working in one’s life, and being willing and able to partner with a more knowledgeable person in order to create tools and strategies to improve weaknesses as they negatively impact strengths. (In other words, the improvements or skill development made sense as it related to what he needed to work for him in what areas.) For conversations, if it is a topic of high interest and background knowledge he already has accumulated, he can hook the auditory conversation to the ready visuals in his mind. If it is entirely new information being discussed, he has found looking at the person creates the ability for him to concentrate on what is being said. In real life, I don’t foresee this being a constant need, as the area of work he will go into will be one based on his strengths. The friends he associates with will be those who have commonalities.

I am more than pleased at how Eli is finding his place in our society, whether it is based on his strengths or his weaknesses. We live at a time there are many options, and he’s not afraid to take them. He doesn’t see it as a deficit that he chooses another alternative, but as a smart choice that allows him to enjoy the experience because it is based on areas of strength for him. In other words, he knows how he learns, and he’s not afraid to use it 🙂

3 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Collaborative Learning, College, Homeschooling, Learning, My Opinions, Right-Brained/Visual-spatial Learners, Unschooling

Update in our Household

Posted on August 1, 2009 | 2 comments

As a blogger, I find that I go through life after an experience saying, “That would make a good blog post”. And then it passes me by and I’m sad that I’m not capturing the moments or the perspective on paper. (As a side note, I’m using my blog as my journal. Every year or two, depending on how much I wrote during that period, I print everything off into a large binder, putting everything in protective sheets, and labeling the front.) So, to try to get going again on a consistent basis, I’m going to update everything happening around here in synopsis format, or better yet, in hopeful blog post options, and hopefully I will blog about each individual thereafter over the next couple weeks.

Cindy (that’s me!). I’ve been continuing to work on my right-brained book. I carved out time this summer to finish it, but worry it won’t happen. I also worry that I’m my biggest enemy to completing it. How do authors do it?! I’ve been a support person to my oldest son, who seems to suffer from bipolar as we now see it. At times, this has brought me to the edge of cracking under the pressure of doing all that I’m supposed to do as the center of this family. We’re currently in a good place. I am in the middle of organizing this coming year’s family focus for everyone. My plate definitely runneth over in that category, but it should be an exciting year of growth for many! So, at least three posts there.

Weston (my hubby). I’m blessed to have the husband that I do, who learns and grows with our family, and supports me as best he knows how. We both know in our particular family that we had to divide and conquer. I take the emotional, educational, and therapeutic roles; and he takes the financial role with key support positions in the home, with particular children for certain areas, as parenting relief for me for high time consumption children, and overall involved father, particularly with community activity involvement the children are in (like coaching soccer and leading the youth group at church, etc.) He is also the one in charge of beautifying our home front and keeping track of our overall vision for it. He’s also a great father who shows our boys how to be men of substance, and show our daughter what a husband can be for a woman. Staying on top of things with his job in this economy takes a lot of stress, and we have had our adjustments in that arena over the past year. Also, this is a creative man who has always needed to be challenged intellectually, so he has discovered an excellent match for him to continue some education. This looks like another three posts!

Eric, Age 22. We have partnered together to continue to understand his anxious and depressive state from the time he was 16. Since my last post, I have come to realize he is battling bipolar. So, that is definitely several posts right there. Anyone who lives with bipolar can attest to my statement that it is the center of his life right now as he figures out how to effectively manage it. When he can be plugged into his life that he desires as well as consistently engaged in his creative outlets and life’s passion, I will know we are on the right track. Baby steps at this point; hopeful progress with our current knowledge.

Abbey, Age 20. Big changes for Abbey as she has left to live out in Utah at Brigham Young University (BYU) in Provo starting this summer. The first weekend of orientation was evidence to her that she would learn and grow tremendously in this new venue she has chosen for her next stage in her life. She has already had many ups and downs that has provided growth opportunities for her. It has been fun to discuss how her unschooled life impacts her life at college, both academically and socially. That should be several posts and more.

Eli, Age 18. Has this young man ever wowed his mother this past year! In his “senior year” of homeschooling, he wanted to start attending community college in order to grow more in his passion of math and computers. He also wanted to face his weak areas and discover what he may still need to do in order to succeed at his life’s plans. Eli is diagnosed with high functioning autism and could have had many other “learning disabilities” attached, such as ADD (big time), CAPD (big time) (central auditory processing disorder), as well as how his ASD (autism spectrum disorder) affects his ability to speak, read/comprehend, and write English well. Eli is also a strong right-brained learner, a builder with a specialty in spatial awareness. Many of you know my passion about the right-brained learner and that there is another legitimate, valid path to how they learn. It is not uncommon for a right-brained person to not prefer auditory input as well as have a difference in attention factors. Many also know I have a particular perspective on how these learners should be valued for how and WHEN they approach learning. I believe in a strengths based foundation and coming to formal academics and learning starting at 11 in order that they can understand the need to build weaknesses as it effects strengths, as well as being able to be truer collaborators at that stage. Well, Eli has shown how well all of this has worked out for him! He is truly coming into his own and flourishing. I have also had an opportunity to work with someone who attended public school who is “ADD” and how that impacts him. I want to do a whole set of posts sharing Eli’s journey to give hope and insight to all the people who have young people with “learning differences”.

Adam, Age 16. Adam is now my TALL young man, as he has reached about 6’1″ on his tiptoes. He lives with moderate to severe autism (moderate because he is partially verbal and can learn to a certain level, and severe because he battles extreme sensory bombardments on a minutely basis and it’s hard not to be consistently agitated and on guard) and he has always toe-walked to some level. Well, it caught up to me and now we are scheduled for foot surgery this September. I’m committed to making sure it doesn’t happen again because I expect this recovery to not be easy based on his limited cognition. However, Adam also had his first emergency room trip this summer after putting his hand through our front window which required 40 stitches. He was amazingly calm and cooperative, so backward blessing as it was, it gives me hope for his recovery from surgery. In NC, the compulsory age for school is 7-16, and because Adam will not ever drive, he is no longer legally required to school. Of course, he enjoys being mentally engaged and loves math and spelling and books, so we do as we want in that arena. With Abbey going off to college, he has lost his therapeutic tutor from the past 1.5 years and transitioned quite well to Ashley this summer. I knew this was temporary as she is a school teacher, so Adam will once again transition to someone else soon, probably a man named Russell. Adam enjoys working with his tutors! So, there are definitely some posts here on behalf of Adam.
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Alex, Age 14. Alex has really matured this past year. He has successfully navigated the stage of my Collaborative Learning Process by the same name; the collaborative learning stage. He is fully independent with his formal academic work, and actually reminds me to get it for him! He has a system that works for him, and me, and this year I want to start challenging him subject by subject past his comfort zone, but still embracing his learning style. He also has incorporated daily chores into his life that he, once again, ASKS every day which part of it he should do. I definitely want to use my recent foray into this stage with Alex to share with readers how this stage looks and what and why I do what I do. There is often MUCH resistance in this stage, but it has to do with being gently, but firmly, guided into the arena of self-awareness, self-determination, and a solid work ethic in order to translate toward the ability to set one’s own goals to achieve purpose with one’s passion. Once they get through this first stage of shifting by collaborating with me in what works for them and what doesn’t, it always amazes me what awaits on the other end of this stage: the Gift Focus Stage. And the independence and self-initiation that occurs is phenomenal!

William, Age 10. I forsee big changes for William this year. Since turning 10, I saw the beginnings of the 11 year old shift in that, for him, it is more that he may be able to cognitively make strides. This is another son with many, many labels attached, and would create much worry if I didn’t know better. We have dabbled here and there, but he is now ready to make some leaps. I am fortunate to have helped him qualify to receive CAP services here in NC (a Medicaid disability waiver program), so I will be training a therapeutic tutor for him soon. Up to now, William has been learning where his strengths are, and for most people, looking at someone like him would be hard pressed to feel he has any. But, if you ask him who he is, he’ll let you know that he is the best pretender there is, he loves to cook and to garden, and he generally wants to learn how to be in control of himself. In fact, last night, Weston, William and Joseph watched Merlin on recorded TV (William LOVING soldiers and knights and swords and weapons), and my husband actually thought he could then put him to bed. But, as I know SO well about William, right after watching the show, he was in costume within seconds and prepared to go into his imaginative place. I corrected my husband as it pertains to this child and William was given space to expend his need to process what he saw through role-playing, and ending with some drawing at the table (which he would be considered to be “dysgraphic”). I suspect William will be reading in his 11s somewhere, maybe 12. Same with math. It’s all good. It all works out. William is much more capable of putting in effort and understanding at his stage now, and he has a solid foundation of his strengths, which we will continue to grow and nurture 60% of his time. Lots of posts with this child pending!

Joseph, Age 8. He is one of my most naturally social children of all my children. Interestingly, he also cares deeply about what others think of him, and he is my first child who cares what he is wearing and looking like. It’s really interesting and fascinating to me. The YMCA in which we attend holds a summer day camp each year, and William and Joseph both wanted to attend last year (I had them go half of the time), and this year (they went almost the entire summer). For Joseph, it starts off fairly well, but by mid-way, trouble starts a-brewing. He is easily offended and hurt by typical child playground tactics as well as typical adult punitive, rule-based consequences and interactions. When Joseph gets hurt, he gets physical. We’ve been working on that a lot. I definitely want to write a post about how the way I parent affects their ability to interact with “schoolish” types of interactions successfully. It’s tricky when my child wants to be part of this type of thing for a season. Usually when we hit this point, though, he’s ready to be done. We both recognize the limitations of his expectations and understandings with the environment and how people behave from those settings. Joseph is also showing that he is more than ready to tackle reading and math things, so we have already somewhat started, and he should be able to finish the process of starting and going by the end of the year. At the beginning of this year, I started William and Joseph in group activities, especially because Joseph is so social. They have done swim team two times a week, karate one time a week, and YMCA sports year round. Joseph is a natural at most things he does, though being small, he probably should concentrate on areas he could continue to progress in to the level he would probably want to later on. Karate is a good fit for him, as is soccer. We think wrestling would be a great fit as well, so we’re working on that. We still encourage all things, naturally, like swim and even football, which is what he is wanting to do as of late.

Pets. At current count, we have 8 cats (indoor/outdoor): Socks/17, Belle/12, Sunflash/11, Xena/9, Ellie, Hanabi, Wally, and Sammy (brothers and sisters)/all 1, two dogs: Spencer/9 and Precious/7. Abbey lost her tree frog she handraised from an egg from the wild, Tasolen/5; and the boys lost their three rats: SugaBuga, Stripe, and Squeeker/all sisters/3. We still have our large fish tank, but our pets are diminishing all and all as to variety.

We are still living on our 15 acres in the log house and loving every minute of it. We finally found a renter who contracted to buy our other house, though it will be a 1-3 year contract period. But, with this economy, they were good renters to find as they repair all things and take care of the house as if it is theirs, which is what we wanted. It will still be nice to have it sold. I guess that could be a post.

Now, I need to commit to posting as indicated in his post. Lots of good stuff happening! Oh, I’m going to try to get a new family photo when my daughter comes home at summer break!

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Posted in Autism, Collaborative Learning, College, Depression/Anxiety/Bipolar, Family, Homeschooling, Learning, My Book, Right-Brained/Visual-spatial Learners, Unschooling

Life Without School Post and Comments

Posted on March 4, 2009 | Leave a comment

I have received a few “blistering” comments on a few of my Life Without School blog posts over the past month. Usually, when someone comments in a highly negative and generalized manner, it can be best to leave it be. This was true of one of the comments when I followed the link to his blog that was all about taking various topics and “tearing it up”. So, it wasn’t worth responding.

Sometimes, even though a negative comment seems to be filled with common misconceptions and generalizations, it is worth considering a response because of the commonality of the generalizations. This was true of this comment. And so, I decided to take my time and write out a response to all those people out there who may hold the same perceptions without taking the time to understand the topic. That response is my Life Without School post called The Myth of Credentialism.

And, sometimes, I respond to a comment expecting absolutely no resolution, but I decide to make at least one well thought out comment in return, with maybe a follow-up to anything that is said in response, and you get totally surprised, like in this short exchange. (Find the comment from “I Put In The Legwork” near the bottom, and my response that follows, and the follow up remark that concludes.) What this exchange showed was that the person had been legitimate in the comment created and was really wanting to understand why it looked the way it did to them. Since it was a recent comment made to a post that was significantly older, a search of “unschooling college” must have found the commenter at my post.Gamma knife surgery and endoscopic surgery is done for ED: To implant a prosthetic device recommended for you buy levitra surgically implanted inside the penis.

Anyway, negative comments are always interesting. Sometimes it can be used as fodder to help clarify; sometimes it’s just best to leave it lie, and still other times, surprise resolution may occur. Blogging is such fun!

Biology Dissection

Posted on January 28, 2009 | Leave a comment

I have had three children navigate their version of experiencing dissection in the category of biology. My first child, Eric, took a class at our Natural Science Center shortly after moving to North Carolina, so he was probably around 14 years old. This was a “homeschool class” that was said to be designed to fulfill this and that educational requirement in this and that. You know the stuff that is normally said that would be appealing to school-based thinking, but doesn’t matter at all to me. But, it did mention dissecting some things and I felt that Eric would be interested in the whole biology aspect and could tolerate a smaller version of dissecting. Eric tended to like a class situation for something like this. He attended and if I recall, they were in groups of two, and they dissected a cow eye and a pig fetus, I think.

Abbey, my second born, was interested in delving into hands-on experiences to determine what type of animal-based career she might be interested in for her future. An opportunity was discovered to attend an eighth-grade veterinary camp at Michigan State University when she was around 14. She had to fill out an application with essays, along with my having to fill out forms and essays as her “science teacher”, in order to be accepted into the program. Abbey was accepted and spent an intensive week doing a myriad of diverse hands-on activities to help her understand what it would take to succeed in the university program as well as the field. It was there that she had several opportunities for dissection, as well as observing a variety of actual surgeries. Here is a picture of one of her dissection opportunities:

Eli, my third born child, is my latest to go through the biology dissection. Science is one of those subjects for him that was right in the middle. He has a basic interest in science, especially since the hands-on aspects of the experiments makes sense to him, but the textbook aspect of it, or the verbal explanations, could be a bit of a struggle since language is difficult for him. Because he has been my first child that knew as a teen that he wanted to go to a university as soon as he could for computer programming, I thought science was a great subject for him to explore learning through a textbook. Eli had enough interest/knowledge from the hands-on aspects of science in order to help him potentially do better with the print material typical of college, so it would be a good experience for him.
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So, at 14-15, he worked through Apologia’s Physical Science, and at 15-16 he worked through their General Science, and at 16-17, he made his way through the Biology text (he is currently finishing up with Chemistry). I ordered the traditional dissection package from Apologia’s recommended site and a dissection kit came in the mail followed closely by the specimens of an earthworm, a crayfish, a fish, and a frog. Now those brought me back to my biology days in high school, along with the smell of the preservative! Eli followed the textbooks directions for dissection and answered the questions. Here is a picture that, as noted, also attracted interest from others:

Three children; three different biology dissection experiences; it all works based on their strengths.

TV and Play

Posted on November 7, 2008 | 9 comments

Like most little people, my children have enjoyed screen-time entertainment. Interestingly, though, as they became teens, most of them only watch limited TV; to those particular programs they enjoy, like Mythbusters, or a periodic special movie.

But no child has benefited from TV to an obvious level as I have seen with William. No matter how many times he watches a movie or show, within minutes, or even before it is finished, he will be pretending some aspect of what he saw and was impressed by. For instance, he happened across Reading Rainbow the other day that had a momentary focus on hockey, and what did I see outside within minutes? This:

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He is the one on the right, and the clothes is the first place he almost always starts. He has on pajama bottoms, which always allow for the “tight fit” of any type of representation needing that, with a sporting top that bears a number, tucked in, of course. He had dug out of a not-much-used box of outdoor equipment and found these rollerblades of his oldest brother when he was that age! (He had given his younger brother, Joseph, a turn with them in this photo.) He then decided my hubby’s (old) golf clubs would make the perfect hockey stick, and a baseball as the puck. The only cement we have around our home now is the area around the pool. So, around and around he “skated” as he moved the “puck” around with his “hockey stick”. This naturally led to talk of arranging to go to some homeschool skate days, which they have never done before. Interests can arise anywhere; anytime. For William, it is often first inspired through screen time.

He is watching Charlotte’s Web now; something he hasn’t chosen for a while. Time will tell what will emerge from that today 🙂

9 Comments

Posted in Homeschooling, Interests, Right-Brained/Visual-spatial Learners, Unschooling

Mother/Daughter

Posted on October 28, 2008 | 7 comments

Abbey chose to have me as one of her “special things” as part of her “senior pictures” portfolio. I’m so blessed to have a daughter who is my best friend. I believe it is because of both how I parented her and the relationship I put first and foremost, as well as the beautiful spirit she is inside. I believe my choice to homeschool was one of the reasons my relationship with each of my children is so incredible. The other is my choice to be a respectful and gentle parent as much as I could create. I wasn’t afraid to say sorry, and I consistently shared my own weaknesses with my children as they were learning and growing on their own journeys. It seemed to give them strength and courage.

As much as I did my part, it was also easy to do with my birth children because of the sensitive and natural compassion they were born with. In other words, they were really naturally respectful children. I have had to struggle more with my adopted children as they have more “normal” tendencies toward bickering, fighting, teasing, and destruction. They have allowed me the opportunity to heal more of my own negative past experiences as well as develop deeper strength in areas in order to be the respectful and gentle parent they deserve. There has been need of many more apologies from me to them.But has anyone considered why that remains the case? In today’s world most women are perennially over worked as they try to find a right balance between successful career and a happy order cialis icks.org married life.

But, I digress. My mother gave me “the curse”: that I might have a daughter just like me. I’m sorry she and I never had the environment and relationship in order to have something more than we did. However, my daughter and I do have a lot of similarities, and because of different choices I have made, and the amazing person Abbey is and has chosen to develop, I absolutely adore my daughter. May everyone have the opportunity for this same “blessing”

7 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Family, Homeschooling, Unschooling

Resistant Learners – LWOS Post

Posted on October 18, 2008 | 2 comments

I am one of the authors over at Life Without School and the blog post I wrote went up and gone before I noticed to make mention of it. This was one of those posts that wrote itself. In my passion for the right-brained, creative learner, I have an adage that says: They love to learn; hate to be taught. I always joke at the beginning of my right-brained workshops that if a parent started with the traditional teaching methods and timeframes most of usOr maybe a pattern was established in an earlier relationship and she was not able to break out of the shackles that erectile dysfunction has imposed in you with generic cialis their store professional. were raised on in institutionalized schooling, we probably ran up against a brick wall fairly quickly: resistance!

In the unschooling world, people will claim that resistance means you are doing something poorly. But, after hearing the phrase, “I have a resistant learner” on my creative learner list for the umpteenth time, I took a closer look at the word “resistance” and discovered a communication tool. And so, here is my understanding of how resistance worked through our children called, Resistance: A Communication Tool.

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Posted in Homeschooling, Learning, Right-Brained/Visual-spatial Learners, Unschooling

Learning vs. Schooling

Posted on October 8, 2008 | 4 comments

Does anyone else have a bunch of saved posts in the Post Writing section that you started and didn’t finish? I do. So, I decided to go through some of them and see what I found. Apparently, I had taken a blurb from a post I had written on a list somewhere and copied it in for further contemplation. So, here’s the blurb:

Ah, yes, the discovery process of what will and won’t work in your home with the schooling process 🙂 What I learned is “schooling” doesn’t work well in a home unless you want to wear a “teacher’s cap”, which I didn’t. I wanted to be a parent-facilitator, which shifted the focus from “working on” to “working with”, sooo, I had to figure out a “learning process” for our family, not a “schooling process”. Does that make sense?

What that meant for me is to look for those learning moments and be there, and fully use those moments when the children are eager and interested and seeking. This meant that at that moment when I was thinking I was going to get some laundry done, the learning moment took precedence. Needless to say, in our home, housework is sporadic 🙂

I’ve mentioned this before somewhere, probably on my blog, that sometimes I get to wondering if I’m just a lazy person when I see how others are doing all these lessons and activities with their children, especially their small children. I just don’t, but it works really well in our home. This post of mine reminds me of why we do it this way: we encourage a learning process instead of a schooling process. I like that. I guess that’s probably why I kept the blurb to write about.

First, in the young years, I SO believe in the idea that play is a child’s work. So, play is a central part of the learning process in our home in the early years. During the preschool years, I focus on helping my children learn their colors and shapes; counting and saying the alphabet; all done incidentally and through toys/play usually. During the 5-7 year old range, I mainly pay attention to the potential for reading and early math such as one-to-one correspondence. Often, my children aren’t ready to formally learn to read, but reading aloud is a center. Also, playing around with numbers via manipulatives, natural occurrences, and the such are encouraged. This is also the age that my children seemed to focus in on one type of play type, whether it was Legos, drawing, pretending, or sports.

In the age range of 8-10 years, I also believe in what Jenifer Fox said in her book, Your Child’s Strengths, that you can’t create the gifts inside your child; they are already in there waiting for expression. I feel it is my job to provide the opportunity for my children to discover their gifts, and that’s what this stage attempts to do. What I saw in my children is that their focus solidifies during this stage and a more mature representation of that gift emerges as it is integrated into other subject areas as well as other higher level play outlets. Reading definitely takes a front row seat during this stage as I facilitate in that direction in the manner and timing that works for each child. Basic math also is highlighted. My read alouds also tend to shift toward more educational ideals.Excess pounds put pressure on the legs and veins cute-n-tiny.com buy cheap viagra increased in the legs, which are required.

I do love that I get to observe my children in their young years (5-10 years old) enjoy getting the most out of these play stages. So many today are cut off in the preschool years from unimpeded play opportunities and explorations. There are preschools with centers, scheduled play dates with friends, and screen time filling in the difference. I don’t regret one moment the old-fashioned childhood I am gifting my children. I was listening or watching some program recently (I forget which) where a person was reminding everyone how easy it is to get so busy that we don’t make time for our children. It was mentioned that a child gets only about 2 minutes a day of individual time! Ouch. I couldn’t understand how that could be. But, then I thought about the typical household of children going off to school and parents to work, so no time there or in the morning beforehand as it is so scheduled to get everyone where they need to be on time. Then, there are after school activities and dinner to prepare, so there is no time there until after dinner, but then there is homework and parents cleaning up, so that leaves just before bedtime, but so many are using the TV as vegging time, so where IS the time?

I love that our lives are so flexible and open-ended. I love that there is exploration opportunities and boredom to fill with new ideas, activities, and discoveries. I love that they each have had their fill of play until it has fulfilled its role in their lives. I love that I have many minutes to hours of individual time with each child each day, as does even my hubby upon returning home from work. Because they filled their days with what they need to give themselves as children, when Daddy comes home, they want to give fully to all that he offers them. Sometimes it’s cuddling together with a good movie, sometimes it’s getting out the balls and bat and playing together, sometimes it’s working alongside him with a project, and sometimes it’s taking a trip somewhere.

Not only has our “learning process” helped each of my children find their passion and purpose thus far, it has helped each of us live with no regrets. Time is precious, and we have that and take advantage of it in spades: individually, within relationships, and as a family!

4 Comments

Posted in Collaborative Learning, Homeschooling, Learning, Unschooling

Alex is on his way . . .

Posted on May 1, 2008 | 4 comments

Alex is 13 years old now and has been working through the Collaborative Learning Stage, as I describe the rhythm of our unschooling cycles, since around 11.5 years old. This is never an easy stage as the children transition from a more relaxed, interest-based environment (seeking their passion) to learning more about goal setting and self-discipline (purpose). With Alex living with autism, it made the transition just a bit bumpier.

I’m so excited to announce that . . . Alex has arrived! Woohoo! We started off like I always do with my children at this stage . . . one or two subjects and working side by side with them. Together, we find resources that work for him. Actually, Abbey was the person who first did this with Alex back when he was somewhere between 11 and 11.5, and they worked together like this for maybe 6 months.

I believe a break occurred, and then I started working with him one-on-one, shifting things around to encourage transitioning into independence. It was always hit and miss at doing the formality, so it was maybe done twice a week, and lasted an hour or two. At a certain point, I didn’t think my current thinking would transfer to independence, so I started looking.

I went to a GIFTS-NC conference last year and picked up what looked like a good idea, if I could modify it to what would work for us. It was what I would call a “better” TEACCH box system. I thought and thought how I could modify it and came up with a good plan. Alex tried it starting just before 13, but he felt it was too overwhelming for him. He started calling “homeschooling time” the “H” word . . . LOL!

So, we took another break and he shared with me what he needed. He said he still needed someone to be with him as he did things. At the same time, Abbey, Alex’s big sister, was able to begin formally working with him through procured state services one-on-one in our home for four hours a day. He was excited as we shared with him what he would be able to do: things like creating his own stories with support, learning computer skills to further his car and other interests, earning money through chores, expanding his understanding through readings and vocabulary work, etc. All of this would be done by creatively interweaving his interests as the process toward worthy products.

Well, about two months into that, I started adjusting the box system and having his older brother sit with him (who wanted to earn some money, too). It didn’t work, adjust, it didn’t work, adjust, it did work! There still seemed to be resistance, though. Then, one day, about three weeks ago, it all started to come together. All the social and emotional and behavioral conversations that were happening with his sister in their “therapy hours” was transferring over into his formal work.

Alex actually started to come and REQUEST his homeschooling. He collaborated with me about adjusting it once again to work exactly the way that is right for him, how often, and when, and the boy is doing it all independently (as he dropped wanting Eric to help him). He does four activities each day, he learned to keep focused (something he had a hard time with) through using a timer, but dropped that after only a week or two, and he learned that he didn’t have to panic if he didn’t understand something, nor did he need someone right next to him to avoid the panic, but all he needed to do is come ask for help. It takes him about an hour to complete.
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So, he’s approaching 13.5 years old and are right about on target for what I say typically happens in this timeframe. It just takes that long to transition, find what works for everyone, and then success. I am already anticipating the next stage of Gift Focus Stage as we are gearing up to match him with apprentices in mechanics. We’ve been trying to put it together and it has been slow going, but I see it happening by 14, so . . .

It’s always so exciting!

Here’s some pictures of Alex doing his homeschooling. He prefers the side porch, and you see his big brother still likes to come along and “spar” with him, literally and figuratively (they love to verbally spar good-humoredly with each other):

4 Comments

Posted in Autism, Collaborative Learning, Homeschooling

Children First

Posted on April 29, 2008 | 6 comments

Elsie, at Elsie and Joe Deluxe, wrote a post called Keep Those Systems Off My Kids. I enjoyed the topic and it reminded me of a VERY important point about how I homeschool my children. She says this at the very end of the post:

But I am equally sure that there are teachers who slavishly follow the precepts of their chosen philosophies, to the point where they don’t even see the children in front of them. I might even say that there are more slavish followers than there are creative thinkers in these systems. I might even be pushed into saying that it is the very creation of a system of education that gives birth to slavish followers.

This is also very true of homeschooling philosophies, which she touches on throughout this post. But I really like how she summarizes that “the very creation of a system of education” or philosophy of education “gives birth to slavish followers”. This means, to me, that the philosophy becomes the end all to the purpose of learning. Unschooling is a prime example of this potentiality. There are as many ways to define unschooler as there are unschoolers, and plenty to go around of those who will tell you if you are “unschooling enough” to be considered one. To me, this misses the entire point, particularly of my view on unschooling.

First, let me share with you a Growing Without School letter I wrote in (and it was published in the November/December, 1997 Issue 119) to make my initial point:

I am writing in response to the letter from Carolyn Ellis in the Challenges and Concerns section of GWS #117. Carolyn’s struggle over accepting her daughter Mary’s learning style and her subsequent “reassurance” that her “other children are still happy unschoolers” raised my philosophical questioning nature again. It made me wonder what the definition of unschooling is.

My definition (at this moment) is following the lead of my child, whether it be in interests or in learning style, and giving respect thereto. I know that many definitions of unschooling include allowing a child to learn in his natural environment and context (learning fractions from cooking, measuring from building, science in the backyard, etc.) as well as learning out in the real world (volunteering, apprenticing, working, etc.). However, as Carolyn discovered about her daughter Mary and as I have certainly discovered about some of my own children, not every child enjoys learning in that hands-on way — or, as in the case of my son Adam, may be limited by neurological biology (autism) in his ability to learn naturally from his environment. And how about a child who in his elementary school years enjoyed learning in natural contexts but subsequently chooses a substantial increase in structure? Are all of these learners not considered unschoolers now?

I believe we would be doing a grave disservice to the origins of unschooling if we defined it as a particular learning style such as “real-world learning.” Wouldn’t that make us just as guilty as traditional schooling of implying that one style is better than another? With such a belief, the educator or facilitator will always be trying to correct, impose, or direct the learner toward this supposedly optimal style, even if it is not the style to which the child naturally inclines.

I declare myself an unschooler even though my daughter Abbey loves workbooks and my son Adam has to be taught most things in a highly structured manner. I say this because I am respecting their need to learn in the way that works best for them. I would declare an older homeschooler who decides to become much more structured in learning an unschooler because she is respecting her ability to know what she needs and wants at each stage of her life. I would declare Carolyn’s daughter Mary an unschooler because she refused to be forced to abandon her learning nature. Carolyn finally was able to respect Mary’s right to be who she was, thus accepting her learning style as viable. What Carolyn may not have figured out yet is that Mary’s learning preference is not a lesser form compared to her other children’s preference for learning from the activities that fit her definition of unschooling.

Is unschooling an educational philosophy or just another learning style that some kids will be grouped into? If it is the first, then I am an unschooler. If it is the latter, than I must call myself a self-led learner with an interest-based curriculum. This way, I could be any type of learner that my nature or desires incline me to be. What other names would represent this educational philosophy: freedom learner? self-determinator? self-learner? autodidact? (My note: I think people call themselves “eclectic” these days to mean what I’m talking about here.)

To summarize my own point in all this, I take another quote from a comment back at Elsie’s blog from Anthromama that states beautifully:

I recall from my Waldorf teaching foundation year that the recommendation was for the teacher (and this would also apply to homeschool parents, I would think) to prep their hearts out, reading about child development and observation, reading about curriculum development,etc….and then essentially letting it all go in the moment with the children. Letting all of the prep be the invisible and somewhat unconscious foundation for what happens in the moment.

I happen to say this same type of thing ALL the time about the various labels available to describe difficulties or learning styles or temperaments. It is the same for my educational philosophy of unschooling. I would research and read and compare and note and contemplate from all the sources I could find and then, and this is the important part, I would file it all away in my brain for any future moment I might find myself at any given time with a child that I might be able to recall something that might be useful in that moment.purchase at unica-web.com cheapest levitra These are accessible in the form 100mg packages in the drug markets which can be bought from the market or from online health stores.

In other words, it’s common for someone to get a label, even a good one like a right-brained, creative learner (which is a positive descriptor), or grasp hold of an educational philosophy, like unschooling, read up all about it, begin to understand it, and then take all that information and apply it on the front end to each situation as it arises. For instance, I have heard someone who has come to understand the creative learner attributes and preferred resources, and then ask, “Is this a creative learner resource? Can I use it?” To me, that is putting up roadblocks to the access of all information and opportunities. Instead, what one can use the information for is something like this:

I observe my child building with Legos for hours. “Should I allow him to play like that for so long and not do something productive?” I access the good information about the creative learner and discover that I found out that this is one of the many creative outlets preferred by this learner and that, in actuality, this process and experience and resource is a foundational element to their gift development of spatial abilities. So, I respond to my own question: “Of course I should allow it. I should even encourage it by bringing in more opportunities and resources of a similar vein. Wow! Look how he’s creating his own contraptions bringing in various parts of others he had previously built. What great visualization abilities which I remember reading is how they learn certain subjects later on.”

The reason this is so important is that it simply begins one’s journey in trusting yourself as the parent/facilitator and trusting the child as a learner. When some of this information challenges one’s conditioned beliefs about what learning is supposed to look like, and one sees how what we observe our children naturally gravitating to matches up to this new and better information, we can truly start allowing the children to come first. No matter how good the information, if we prioritize that in front of, on top of, or over what our children are showing us, we miss the opportunity to create a space for that child to truly unfold into their unique selves.

My job, as a parent facilitator, is to first, observe, trust, and give value to what emanates from my child and feed into more of that. Second, it is to use some of that good information I collect about my child’s learning style or temperament or differences and provide more opportunities and available resources that might be found useful by the child. And, last, to bring in healthy mentoring that my experiences and wisdom garner in any given moment or situation or circumstance that the child might find helpful along their own path.

So, to conclude, gathering good information about learning styles, temperaments, timeframes, educational philosophies, difficulties, is good, but:

Children First.

To me, this develops the trust that we are unique individuals.

6 Comments

Posted in Homeschooling, Learning, Unschooling