Category Archives: Beginnings

When Love is Blessed

Posted on July 5, 2010 | 2 comments

I don’t believe in coincidences. If I notice what others consider coincidence, I recognize it as the hand of a loving Heavenly Father pouring out His blessings. I haven’t blogged since mid-April because my daughter, Abbey, returned from her year at college on April 22. She is my only daughter and I adore her and our relationship, so I was reconnecting with her in person. However, within a few weeks of her return, a love interest captured her attention, and thus I have been enjoying watching her journey unfold.

So, here are the evidences that Heavenly Father is blessing Ben and Abbey’s love:

The timing is perfect. Abbey did not have much if any dating experience before going out to college. She attended two semesters and a term and was able to date frequently, including a couple young men from whom she was able to learn a lot. In the end, she had figured out what she was looking for in a relationship.

Ben converted to the church 2.5 years ago and has been searching for a love that is meaningful, fulfilling, and with eternal depth. He switched housing last September which meant that he needed to attend the ward (building) that our family is in. Initially, he thought about requesting staying where his friends and support were, but his bishop counseled him to go where he was meant to go, so he did. Though he didn’t really make any friends, he came every week and faithfully served in his calling (assignment) to teach a Sunday School class. His obedience and patience paid off when he met Abbey.

They both felt a strong initial attraction, physically and spiritually, when they first saw each other that first week. Smitten at first sight really does exist!

Ben signed up to join the military a year or so ago, but a long story short, paperwork wasn’t completed to sign off on a particular situation, and basically he was not able to continue with it. In fact, he is still working through completing the process of being discharged without incident because the fault was in the hands of the military administration. So, if that had occurred, he would be stationed who knows where.

I had become really disenchanted this past winter, realizing now that I may be affected from time to time with seasonal changes. It was a much colder winter here in North Carolina last winter, and it was wearing on me emotionally. My hubby and I were very close to requesting a transfer ourselves into another church ward in order to “start over”. Upon much prayer and consideration, we felt we needed to stay where we were. Thus, Abbey and Ben were able to meet.

A free radical is a molecule that is lacking an electron, antioxidants come in and deactivate the molecule by donating shop at website viagra prescription the lacking electron.
As another timing element, Ben’s commitment to his conversion of the gospel of 2.5 years through action has proven to Abbey his strength, his desire to change and grow, and the depth of his character.

As they contemplate marriage together, Abbey will most likely postpone college to work full-time and continue pursuing the writing and publishing of her books again. It comes at a time when I am looking for full-time workers in my home that she has done before. Further, there was a glitch over the past year wherein a family member in the home cannot work with her own siblings under 18. She was grandfathered in for this year, but one of her brothers will become an adult in September, who will also increase in hours/need, and his worker is having a baby, so she can just roll into working with that brother. Coincidence? or blessing?

I talked of the physical evidences of blessings received so that they would come together just at the right time in their lives to recognize a perfect match. But it doesn’t even include the perspectives that line up such as Ben wanting to work with Abbey’s brothers who have autism (he didn’t even bat an eye at their differences, but was rather intrigued), or that he enjoys our family and likes to hang out with us (our bond is important) and they should be able to live near us since he’s a North Carolina boy and the career he’s pursuing is nursing (lots of opportunities nearby), or that he totally supports the idea of homeschooling because he admires so much how Abbey represents her upbringing (he finds her clever and talented), but that Ben also wants to learn and grow alongside Abbey and carve out a path they can create together in a mindful way (which lifelong learning is so important to Abbey as an unschooler and true follower of Christ).

Though Ben’s and Abbey’s journeys start from almost opposite spectrums, they have come together at the right time on that journey with attributes, experiences, and perspectives that blesses one another. What a blessed love they have!

Of course, Abbey says that his being tall, dark, and handsome, his smelling wonderful, and his being a great kisser doesn’t hurt!

2 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Beginnings, College, Family, Homeschooling, Spiritual, Unschooling

Visiting Abbey’s College Campus

Posted on March 18, 2009 | 5 comments

There are so many different aspects I need to blog about as it pertains to Abbey’s path to college. I may be able to touch on a few in this post. Abbey has never attended a formal class before, unless you count driver’s education classes at the local high school. As mentioned in a previous post, Abbey decided suddenly last summer that she wanted to pursue college. As mentioned in that post, she was late by a few days in the colleges of her choice receiving her ACT scores, so she officially missed the deadline. She applied to Brigham Young University, Idaho, as her primary choice, and they asked her to reapply because of the missed deadline. We didn’t pursue what that meant because of what happened to her second choice: Brigham Young University, Provo (the main campus). This institution simply qualified her for the next available term or semester, which happened to be Spring Term, and she was accepted! Provo is fairly competitive, so we weren’t sure she would be accepted. Plus, Idaho had a great creative writing program, which is what she thought she would pursue.

(The “Y” on the side of the mountain near BYU, Provo.)

However, because of the immediate acceptance into Provo, we decided to look around their site and see what kind of Creative Writing program they offered. But, we couldn’t find it anywhere. So, we ended up looking at every category of degree until we found a “writing emphasis” degree under a General Studies category. Yuck! But, this process got us thinking. If she were to pursue a creative writing degree, the type of job she would need to pursue would be something with magazines or newspapers and the such. But, she wants to write novels, and there really isn’t a job out there except as an entrepreneur, which is the way Abbey wants to pursue it. Soooo, as we had perused the site, we ran across special education teacher, and it really popped at us. Abbey has been working officially through an agency with her brothers with special needs for the past year, and she’s a natural at it! We got to talking, and some of the benefits I pointed out in pursuing this degree as it pertains to getting an actual job are these: it is not year-round and one gets liberal vacation time (scheduled, though); she wants to homeschool, so a teaching certificate often bypasses certain legalities; she could tutor from home; it is in high demand so if she does it temporarily or needs to move often, she should be able to find employment easily. Those were the things that came off the top of my head.

Abbey wants to be a stay-at-home mom. She wants to homeschool her children. She wants to be an author of novels. All of these things she knows she can do as an autodidactic. Pursuing college has a couple of purposes: she wants to have more of a social life. Having been a homeschooler all her life, she just was different. It was hard for her to find teens that wanted to be associated with different. Abbey was comfortable, but she is really interested in the dating scene. She started off thinking of unschooling her career path into authorship, but finding peers in her position was hard to come by because so many go off to college. Sooo, thus, her decision to put herself where everyone is. Again, she thought of pursuing her unschooled career next to a large university, but she decided against it because of her second reason: the world values degrees, so she felt that it might be useful to have one in case she needed it. In other words, it gave her options if she needed it beyond her career of choice. And, special education appears to be a perfect way to enhance her ultimate goals as a stay-at-home, unschooling mother.

Because Abbey was not able to start university for Winter Semester like she had hoped, she had time between November when she found out, and June (we ended up postponing to Summer Term, which made the most sense) when she would start. I suggested that she take a couple of classes at the local community college in order to have at least one experience with a classroom setting before going into such a competitive schooling environment. So, she chose Expository Writing, since so much of college is writing, and Spanish I, since it had been a while since her self-taught Spanish learning in her unschooled years, and BYU has a requirement to pass a second year language level. So far, Abbey has learned to budget studying time, learn study skill habits, and understand the logistics of a classroom setting and the requirements of an instructor. She is receiving top scores at this time, which she feels good about since she anticipates that BYU will certainly be an increase in difficulty from a community college level.

So, that brings us to our recent trip. It was spring break for community college, and I decided last minute that Abbey and I should take a trip to BYU, which she had not visited yet. Airfare rates were good, so we jumped on it. It was just what she needed to make more informed choices about on-campus housing choices and meal plan options. Abbey also enjoyed just getting to “feel” the student environment as we walked around the campus amongst the hustle and bustle of the student body. We started off with a tour of the campus. We waited in their visitor’s center for our student tour guide:

(Abbey standing in front of an aerial photo of the BYU campus)If PE can be controlled with herbal treatment for overweight. selling here generic levitra

Naturally, the student tour guide was a well-spoken young man who drove us around in a zippered protected golf cart (back to a winter state!) and answered any of our questions. Some of the extra-curricular programs Abbey may be seriously considering once she gets out there is intramural sports and working on the BYU newspaper.

The BYU Bookstore was awesome. The first thing we saw when we walked in were a table of modest undershirts. Abbey and I have clocked in hours at the malls trying to find these! And, here we are, in modest city, with a whole table laid before our eyes in all different colors. We snatched up several. Naturally, we also had to buy something to get her in the spirit of her next adventure:

(Isn’t she adorable?!)

My latest repetitive question I get from people are, “I’ll bet you’re really going to miss her, huh?” These people know how close Abbey and I are and she is absolutely my best friend. But, it’s funny. At this time, I don’t feel like I’m going to “miss her”. I’m totally excited about her next stage and this adventure she has chosen. As I have contemplated why I don’t feel like I’m going to be crushed with her leaving is this: I am confident in our relationship we have. It is strong and solid. Distance will not threaten it. We know we will be as close as ever. She already has me set up for Skype and her Christmas present was a cell phone on our calling plan. She will share her journey every step of the way as she always has. I have always enjoyed the privilege of walking alongside my children on their own personal journeys, and it will continue when they leave our home as when they are here.

The strength of our relationship bonds us across the miles.

5 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Beginnings, College, Family, Unschooling

A President of Color

Posted on January 23, 2009 | 4 comments

I tried to get William (9) and Joseph (8) to pay attention to the inauguration of Barak Obama on Tuesday. They just couldn’t be bothered with a man, even if he is brown, that just sits and talks. Finally, I thought I saw my “in”. As Barak and Michelle were walking down the street in front of their limo, I remembered all the secret service “policemen” all around them. So, I called the boys over again, and pointed them out and explained their role. I let them know that the president of the United States always has secret service policemen. Now, that got their attention. What surprised me, though, is that instead of William, my most prolific pretender between the two, pretending to be the secret service, he became “William the President” and hired Joseph as his secret service. Ah, ha! He liked the power to hire instead of the act of protecting . . . LOL! So, William went and got his Sunday best on, grabbed a chair to put on another chair as a podium in which to give his speech (he was paying attention!), and Joseph is in his army outfit, and hippo is holding the arsenal:

This said, I can’t help but talk about the topic that Barak Obama is a president of color, not a “black man” as president. It’s funny, because I absolutely know what is going on because of my own two boys. It doesn’t matter what nationality you really are. What matters is the color of your skin, just like Martin Luther King, Jr., points out. It really hasn’t changed in many regards. So, Barak Obama is half African and half caucasian American. But, his skin is brown, so he will be treated as a black man. William and Joseph are also biracial. Their mother is caucasian and their father is African-American. But, it doesn’t matter because their skin is brown; therefore, they will be treated as “black men”. And I knew this. And it is true.

Tiger Woods took it upon himself in the beginning to continuously bring up the fact that he is only one-quarter African-American. His father is biracial that includes African American (50 percent), Chinese (25 percent) and Native American (25 percent) ancestry. His mother, originally from Thailand, is also biracial that includes Thai (50 percent), Chinese (25 percent), and Dutch (25 percent) ancestry. This makes Tiger Woods himself one-quarter Chinese, one-quarter Thai, one-quarter African American, one-eighth Native American, and one-eighth Dutch. But, probably much to his dismay, our society doesn’t accept it. Because he has brown skin, he will be treated as a “black man”.So, cialis without prescription deeprootsmag.org never left untreated the problem of over masturbation.

I personally think it’s more wonderful that Barak Obama is biracial. Biracial people have a rough time of it beyond the scope of the typical African-American, because they tend not to be accepted by any people. The white people don’t accept them because of the color of their skin, and the black people don’t accept them because they are “not black enough.” That is, of course, until they become president of the United States. Or a super star golf player.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying any of this in a disgruntled way at all. I’m a realist by nature and I just see things as they are, no judgment attached. Barak Obama becomes even more of a role model for my boys because he is biracial. He is a role model to all people of color, in my opinion, not just African-Americans. And certainly I believe Martin Luther King, Jr.’s, original message that people of color be judged by the content of their character instead of the color of their skin won out in this election year. I think most people voted based on character and political agenda, not race or color. America truly has grown up.

4 Comments

Posted in Beginnings, Family, My Opinions

Writing Accountability

Posted on November 19, 2008 | 9 comments

I’ve been so blessed to have an amazing journey of learning through understanding and supporting my children as they find their passion and purpose in life. As I matured in this knowledge, my friend Rebecca (who I met on an on-line forum!) from Illinois and associated with the In-Home Conference for their state, asked if I would be interested in speaking. That was 2002. It would be the first step in the igniting of my passion regarding the right-brained learner. It was at this conference that my tentative steps at sharing the myriad of things that my children taught me about that learning style grew exponentially.

A few years ago, I decided I wanted to take the information about the right-brained learner further by writing a book. I wanted to be the means through which real change might occur in our current out-dated educational system regarding this learner. But I struggled. I realized that I had to introvert myself enough to write, and I was failing in that endeavor. So, I decided to help myself in a two-fold manner by created a yahoo group to discuss my perspective on the right-brained learner. That was a few weeks after one of my presentations at the In-Home Conference, so March of 2006. First, writing e-mails is an extraverted way to write and second, I’ve been amazed at how much my knowledge has achieved clarity through helping diverse people navigate the implementation of this new and better information about how a creative person learns.

That takes me to today. I dedicated this summer to beginning my book I’ve envisioned. I got started, and then had to abandon it for a crisis in the home. Now that I have come out of that, I want to rededicate myself, but I think I need accountability. So, I’ve decided to write consistently on my blog, at least weekly, to share what I’ve accomplished. Anyone willing to nudge me along would be greatly appreciated.

I have the first three chapters done. Today, I worked from 8:00 a.m. to 12:00 noon (and is my goal every day, when everyone seems to need me less; I just needed to get off e-mail and blog reading :-)) and really nailed down Chapter Four. By “done” at this point, I mean the writing is there, along with any visuals I wanted inserted. I intend to put about a page worth of questions and answers at the end of each chapter associated with the topic, gleaned from my own writing on my e-mail group to personalize things. That will have to come at the very end. I want to complete the book by December 31! If I can commit to at least this four hours a day, plus maybe eight on Saturday, I think it is possible.Strain the decoction and take a glass of lemonade and sit https://unica-web.com/members/andorre.html cialis samples back.

It’s absolutely exciting as I put it together. I feel a great responsibility to complete this on behalf of all the creative children whom I love dearly. Interestingly, I’m developing a friendship with someone locally who I noticed some time back that I felt drawn to, but only recently had the opportunity to follow through with it. Coincidentally, she is an amazing entrepreneur in her past life and upon learning of my personal goals has encouraged me to think big, even as I sometimes undermine myself in believing it is possible.

On the other hand, I know one of the beliefs regarding those who are successful at what they do is something to the effect of “they believe in something and are not afraid to go for it.” I believe in what I do with the right-brained learner SO much, but I do recognize fear in my life. Here’s to overcoming it by holding myself accountable publicly!

9 Comments

Posted in Beginnings, Family, Interests, Learning, Right-Brained/Visual-spatial Learners, Writing

“Senior Pictures” for Abbey

Posted on October 29, 2008 | 4 comments

Abbey laughed when she saw my previous post with the words “senior pictures” in quotes. That’s because our “senior picture” timing is quite different from the mainstream tradition. First, it seems to happen around 19 some time because that’s when the shift seems to occur for my children in moving away from the home-based lifestyle.

Let me back it up a bit more than that. It goes back to that age-old question we hear all the time as parents of school-aged children, “What grade are you in?” My children have never known how to answer that question; heck, I’ve never known how to answer that question. Just yesterday, I took my 17-year-old son, Eli, and my 7-year-old son, Joseph, to get their medical physicals done. One of the questions: “What grade are you in?” Joseph immediately said, “kindergarten.” He has said that for three years now . . . LOL! Because he heard that “Oh, are you going to kindergarten, question, so often at 5, it has stuck with him as the answer to the question. It works for now 🙂 For Eli, we looked at each other, and said, “I don’t know, are you a senior? Are you a college student? Put, first year college student.” He’s taking community college classes this year as he has been my child that has desired college since he was probably 14. We have mapped out “a plan” that should work very well for him with his strengths and weaknesses. He’s excited. But, we both still consider him a home-based learner, though he takes community college classes . . .

. . . he isn’t ready to transition yet out of the home. And that is what seems to constitute my idea of “senior picture” time and/or “graduation time”. Because I don’t have “criteria” for them to pass in order to be out of our homeschool, because we don’t grade or test, because we don’t sift and sort, we have allowed life to let us know when we feel a desire to celebrate a new beginning. And that seems to be when each child is ready to transition away from home, whether short-term or long-term.

For instance, Eli was more than ready to take community college classes, but he views it as the next step of his learning path from home. Abbey was tentatively ready to work full time last January, but also viewed it as the next step of her life journey living and learning from home. Neither of these indicated a “transition” from their home-based life learning path.

This past summer, Abbey decided suddenly that she was ready to pursue a college track and desired to leave home to seek her adult path. Her eyes were set for leaving in January. So, that prompted me to schedule her “senior pictures”. Because I set a precedent with her older brother, I went all out with a local professional photographer where she could change outfits and bring in “props” that represented her personality and style. Here is the pictorial result:

This is the pose she chose as the picture she will send to everyone. She has always been a casual-type of gal, so she loved the color and being outdoors; both of which reflect her personality.It is estimated that sex health dysfunction affects more than 40% of men appalachianmagazine.com viagra price ignore consulting doctor for impotence treatment, and most of the affected individuals are above 40 years may encounter this problem and it may increase the risk of drug reactions.

This is the pose, obviously, with her guitar, but she thought her particular style of jewelry, which she doesn’t wear often (neither do I), would go well together. Though she says she looks like a “rocker chick”, she and I know it is actually reflective of a different style altogether that is all “Abbey”.

These are two of her bestest friends: Precious (on the left) and Spencer (on the right). This was at the end of the shoot, and the dogs weren’t that thrilled (Precious was highly suspicious of the photographer!), we were able to capture this moment that Abbey liked the most, though her smile was not typical, it still reflected a natural moment from her perspective. I chose a different pose that had it’s pros and cons. There were also a couple other outfit/poses that we chose for various reasons. Overall, she had a lot of fun and found shots that we could be excited about as reflective of who she is.

Because she didn’t make the October 1 deadline, she has been postponed to enter college in the spring (though she’s looking now to postpone to summer for logical reasons) (more on this in another post). So, we may postpone sending out the transition/graduation announcement until closer to her time to leave. As always, Abbey took the postponement with grace and optimism. Everything happens for a reason!

4 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Beginnings, College, Family, Unschooling

Unschooling Transcripts

Posted on October 3, 2008 | 3 comments

To continue from my previous post about my daughter’s natural path to attending college, I thought it would be interesting to share my responsibilities as the administrator of our homeschool as it pertains to the application process. When my children were younger and we were just still in the young years of unschooling, I would periodically listen in on workshops and conversations from those further down the path. In particular interest was the college application process. Talk of how to keep track of studies that would go on the official transcripts would ensue. It always seemed too overwhelming to me, and frankly, too packaged for the freestyle learning life we were experiencing. I questioned my ability to be that organized.

Fast forward to my oldest son turning 14 and thus, being of high school “age”. I still couldn’t get myself to be that organized. I chose the unconcerned path that it would all work out in the end. I think the biggest reason I felt comfortable with this approach is that my hubby is an academia enthusiast. He LOVES to learn and often contemplates trying to work out his ability to return to his favorite environment: university. And he’s good at it. He knows how to work a resume as much as a university application. He sells himself well. During my business college years, I also discovered I had a knack for selling things. I did an externship at a radio station where I started off as the sales secretary, moved to personally generating donations to the station myself, and finally ended up as the personal assistant to the owner of the station. In three months! During my employment stints, I also discovered that I knew how to sell myself both on paper and during the interview process. So, I guess I went into this arena with some confidence on both ends backing up my laid-back stance.

Admittedly, I’m still probably on the learning curve on how to present the unschooled transcript on paper at its best, but I’m satisfied with the level in which I intend to present it. There are certain things I’m willing to do to accommodate our different educational choice, and there are certain things I’m not willing to negotiate. Taking the GED, for instance, is one thing I’m going to discourage my children to do. Each state has regulations regarding home education and its legal status which includes the administrator having the right to graduate its students, so I refuse to be required to jump through an additional hoop outside the given law. It’s like they say, “Yes, we give you the right to homeschool, but we will not give you the respect or validity without some connection to our system.” Tough. I force the validity to occur by refusing their extra hoops. That said, because our learning environment is different from the school system, our transcripts will look different as well. I decided not to replicate the traditional transcript.

So, here’s Abbey’s transcript as submitted to Brigham Young University, both Provo and Idaho:

Drat the formatting on this site! (If anyone can direct me as to how to turn off the automatic double spacing upon hitting the return, I would be much obliged.) Ha! I decided to upload it as a photo and forget the cut and paste . . . tricked the system 🙂

Anyway, my new addition to my transcripts is to depict “advanced placement courses”. These are any subjects studied that there was either a significant amount of time dedicated to it (giving value to process) or a significant amount of physical output (giving value to product). To give a brief comparison to the world’s measurement standard (the ACT scores) and my daughter’s actual experience with learning, I give the following information:
You amerikabulteni.com cialis prescription are advised to use herbal pills to reverse the aging effects.
For her perfect grammar score, Abbey worked through all five Daily Grams books from the age of about 13-16 years old. No formal work before or after that except that she wrote novels from age 14-19. Daily Grams is supposed to be a “supplement” to a real grammar program, but I disagree. Most grammar programs just try to make something that is simple, hard.

Abbey had no formal English (34 score-excellent) or reading comprehension (28 score-above average) programs or exercises. She read voraciously, although “below her level” by what others would think. She also re-read books hundreds of times sometimes. She wrote very simple stories when young, never more than a couple paragraphs. She started journaling around nine years old. She started writing novels at 14 years old.

For her average math score (20-average), she worked her way through a conceptual math series (out of print, called Real Math) that took her through pre-algebra. She worked through some of Saxon algebra and stopped.

For her science (25-above average), she never used a formal textbook or even read many science-related books. She was huge into nature and loved animals. She learned a lot from experience.

Many of the classes listed on her transcript were from experience. How I came up with the classes was to remember what colleges are looking for: science, history, foreign language, math, etc., and put educationese to what she did in those categories. The reason I started there was because my children really do a whole lot more than those types of subjects. However, I don’t want to overkill the point of a transcript. After putting down the required courses desired from colleges, I then generously sprinkle their gifts and passion throughout the transcript to highlight that. Last, I add a course or two that shows diversity in experience.

I refuse to “gather proof” throughout the years because it would then take a beautiful emergent life of discovering one’s passion and purpose and water it down to dotting i’s and crossing t’s. It will turn something that is multi-dimensional into a one-dimensional depiction. Luckily, my children feel the same way and are willing to forego a college who doesn’t recognize this to find one that will. Hopefully, if we “sell ourselves” well, which could include an interview if necessary, though I don’t think that will be necessary for her college of choice (BYU-Idaho), her life as it really unfolded will be more than enough. And, of course, it is 🙂

3 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Beginnings, College, Unschooling

A Natural Process to College

Posted on October 2, 2008 | 7 comments

My hubby and I decided to continue trusting our philosophy with the natural stages of learning as our children transition into adulthood. As noted in an earlier post, it did require that we continue our deconditioning of our current society’s expected “shoulds” at this stage. The biggest one, obviously, is the college path. Initially, my oldest child, Eric (now 21), has resisted college because he isn’t sure he wants to play the game involved. My second child, Abbey (now 19), also put college on a shelf as she chose to develop her writing skills independently and find out how far she could take it on her own. My third child, Eli (now 17), has been my first child who has wanted to attend college right up front. So far, my oldest three children continue to show how different the paths can be even in the same family.

I find Abbey’s path is the most interesting at this time because it seems to depict the natural process as I described it in it’s most “typical” form in my Collaborative Learning Process for the 17-19 year old range:

The Transitional Stage (Ages 17-19). This is the stage that the child moves from a home and dependency based lifestyle to a community and independent based lifestyle. Some will move seamlessly into this stage, while others will be hesitant, and yet others will be outright resistant. This stage can encompass such things as consistent work, volunteer opportunities, college preparatory pursuits, entrepreneurial steps, and/or travel options. It is time for a full adult schedule, whatever and wherever it ends up.

I spent a lot of time in this stage helping each child figure out how to enter an adult lifestyle of their choosing and embrace a full schedule by sharing experience and insights regarding any acquisition process and modeling a mindful lifestyle through peer collaboration.

The biggest transition that occurs during this timeframe is moving into a full adult schedule. An opportunity arose where Abbey could work a full-time job through an agency servicing the Medicaid Waiver CAP program in our state for disabled children and adults. Because of our move to a new county that operates on a special waiver (which means they can create their own rules regardless of the state’s rules), she was eligible to work for her own brothers in our home. This was a HUGE God-send for me as she would be easily trained because of her self-initiated involvement in creating a relationship with her different brothers as well as her knowledge of the family dynamic. On her end, she could make double the money as most beginning jobs and she would have the ability to have full-time status in a more demanding job, again, both of which are not always easy to find at her age of 18 at the time. She wasn’t sure about moving to full-time work as she thought it might be too big of a jump for her from working 10 hours a week tutoring her younger brothers to 40 hours a week utilizing more advanced skills. I assured her that if she felt it was too much after a month or so, she could always just do one of her brothers (she works with each of two brothers at 20 hours a week each).

It took her several weeks to a month to work out balancing a full time position with her continued desire to work on her novels as well as finding her place in contributing within the family. She works from 9:30-1:30 with Alex and 2:00-6:00 p.m. with Adam every day and would put in 3-4 hours each night on her novels. One of the things that naturally occurred within our family is that at around 18 and/or as each of these young people were committing to more activities outside of family living, I would disengage my need to use them in fulfilling family responsibilities such as babysitting or any daily chores. This would simply convert down to the next children as they were each developing their particular attributes for the stage they were in. It’s not that the young people don’t contribute, it’s just in a different way. It was like an instinctive thing for me to shift my views and interactions with them during this stage from dependent child to independent young person in order to give them the space and release of dependence to act in the way that is best for their growth extending outside of the home.

So, Abbey started full-time employment in the home at 18.5 years old and has been going strong for nine months now and saving her money. About two months ago, a sudden shift occurred within Abbey. In mid-July, she unexpectedly declared that she wanted to attend college . . . in January if she could pull it off. Though she had been satisfied up until now about what she was concentrating her efforts on, and where, she had reached a natural state where she wanted to leave the home and seek adventure in a way that would allow a different kind of growth, both from her home lifestyle as well as from her own independent studies. College became the clear answer in her mind.Incapability is the condition where an individual do not possess the sex buy viagra online seanamic.com desire.

Because Abbey had not desired college before now, she also had no inspiration to study for and take the ACT or SAT exams before now. So, the first thing she did was sign up to take the first available ACT test. She was fortunate that there was one in early September as she discovered the admission’s deadline for the school of her choice was October 1. It would be pushing it! Abbey set to a study plan to learn all that she needed to know in 1.5 months. She knew English and Reading were her strengths, but math and science were never at the top of her list of interests as she unschooled through high school. It didn’t take long that it wasn’t just about learning the subjects, but was equally about knowing how to take a timed test, both the timing part and the testing part. Interestingly, she found she didn’t have to actually KNOW everything. Abbey was able to accomplish all the studying needed to do the best she was capable of. That last week before the test, she felt she had done all she could do to prepare.

So, here we are, at October 2. She had accomplished all the requirements of admissions by the deadline and had simply to wait to see if the ACT scores would post quickly and be sent on time. Last Friday, her ACT scores posted on line. My hubby called to see if Abbey was available from work to look since he saw that they were available. She was currently gone on a community trip and wouldn’t be back for about a half hour. I told him he should wait and let her look first. He agreed, but then called back within 5 minutes and said he couldn’t wait and looked. Naughty dad! LOL! Abbey has always been a good sport about this type of thing and he knew it. Of course, I had to have him tell me . . . LOL! Abbey laughed when she got home, but then asked how she did 🙂 She scored a 27! Woohoo. This was the number she needed in order to not be required to jump through additional hoops from the college of her choice because she was a homeschooler. I’ll admit, I had been annoyed by this extra hoop jumping required. If she had not scored at least a 27, she was being asked to take the GED, which we were going to refuse. We’re just glad we didn’t have to cross that bridge. Plus, the best she had ever done in her practice exams was 26, so she had passed herself in the actual test. It ended up being science that pulled her up! She was sure surprised by that, but pleasantly so as she had worked hard. Her high score was naturally English at 34 (getting a perfect score with usage/mechanics).

So, that hoop is jumped, but we had to wait to see if the sent ACT score would reach her preferred college on time. Yesterday came and went and it did not post as received. Bummer. But, we got her copy today in the mail. So, we’re still confident that it was received by the school and just not posted yet. Plus, they said that missing the deadline didn’t necessarily keep them out of consideration for the semester she applied for. So, time will tell.

Well, this is getting long, so I’ll post tomorrow about my “transcripts” and how I did that and what it looked like. But, the point I was trying to make with this post was that Abbey discovered in her own time and in her own way when or if college was a right choice for her. And once that happened, everything falls into place as it should and it no longer is a chore or a fear or a should, but an exciting opportunity that she embraces.

7 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Beginnings, Collaborative Learning, Unschooling

Collecting Articles About College, Unschooling, and Success

Posted on April 9, 2008 | 3 comments

I currently have two adult children, by society’s standards and their age identification process. My oldest recently turned 21, and my next will be 19 at the beginning of summer. Both have been unschooled all their lives. Both have found their passions. Both are working out their purpose.

Abbey, my only daughter, and the person who will be 19 this summer, is a fantasy writer. She has been dedicating full time hours to this pursuit for several years or more now. When college came up, at first, she considered it, but quickly thereafter, upon looking at the process of pursuing it and the sacrifices involved for the product promised, she immediately stated ‘you’ve raised us to question the status of learning traditionally, why should I embrace it now? I’m going to look into my alternatives’. She is doing just that.

Interestingly, the only reason she keeps the possibility of college on her consideration plate is because that’s where all her peers are, and she wants the opportunity to date and be married. She figures she may have to go where she can find lots of people in the same pursuit. Lately, she’s questioning the reasoning again. Just like the 3-18 age range, it DOES take more creativity to find one’s social outlet when the choice is to not engage in the institution that segregates these ages away from real life.

My oldest, Eric, just turned 21, is trying to decide which of his many interests and talents would be best to pursue in lieu of his recent realization that college is not for him. He stumbled on a site that was searching for voice actors for a fan-made radio drama that he auditioned for and received the part. This is an area he’s considered off and on for some years now. He’s also considering writing manga. He figures he will find other employment to support himself until his pursuits are realized in a way that he can independently exist. He originally had liked the idea of Japanese history, but figured it can be incorporated into these other areas as well as simply enjoying it for its own benefit.

It makes full sense that always unschooled people would continue that path as adults. I was able to listen to a panel of grown unschoolers at the Rethinking Education conference last September, and most had foregone college. All were finding their way based on what was important to them. That’s what I’m seeing in my children. They don’t know any other way than to exhibit silent resolve that they will make their way.

Fee structure: acquisition de viagra appalachianmagazine.com this is another vital thing that you need to consider.
So, I find myself needing to gather articles for my own continued deconditioning during this phase of life. Boy, I thought the kindergarten transition was tough; the adulthood transition is tougher out there with all the expectations for this stage in our society and all the underlying definitions of success. So, I revisit my original goals for unschooling: Encourage my children to find work they love so they don’t have to work a day in their lives. And, so the journey continues. And, they DO love their lives . . . today. They have loved their childhoods. And they expect to love their adulthoods. How many can say that?

The article I found by Alfie Kohn at the blog of LIFE with Granola *Girl* fits this well. It’s found here. Of course, the outspoken John Taylor Gatto is always a go-to guy when it comes to these matters, and Life Learning Magazine recently published his “A Letter To My Granddaughter” about “Don’t Worry About College”. And, while I was reading over at Life Learning Magazine, I found Sarabeth Matilsky’s article “Redefining Success” that I felt would resonate with my children.

I’m just beginning my journey in my search for inspirational articles and like-minded people in the same stage, so I’m open to hearing other recommendations from any of you who have found some good ones! Of course, my own journey started some years ago, when my oldest led me to unschooling in the first place. He hinted at unschooling continuing into adulthood when I wrote this, and this, so it is simply time for me to fully embrace what it all means and offers in our continued joyful living path!

3 Comments

Posted in Adulthood, Beginnings, Homeschooling, Interests, Right-Brained/Visual-spatial Learners

Thank you 2007; Hello 2008!

Posted on December 31, 2007 | 2 comments

Wow! 2007 has been a blur for me. So much has happened that has kept me from blogging as faithfully as I did the year before. And now 2008 approaches. I wonder what it holds!? I have hardly had a breath to consider my thoughts, goals, or desires for the new year, so I decided to take the time right now to do so via my blog.

Eric and Abbey, my two young adults (wow!) are off to a New Year’s Eve party; Eli is programming on his new laptop he received for Christmas (so many blessings this year! Thanks go to my Father in Heaven); Adam just requested another orange pop in his bedroom (that he has been sleeping in instead of ours since moving here one month ago, yay!); Alex is watching TV downstairs (is he watching one of his Full House episodes he received for Christmas?); William is watching the SpongeBob movie on our new flat screen TV (woohoo; we’re always some years behind the times before moving into new technology); Joseph is upstairs taking a bath while Dad watches TV on the other big flat screen TV with DVR (we’re only getting used to the possibilities!); and here I am . . . thinking.

Let’s see, as for computer time, I want to do less with my e-mail groups, more with my blog, and finally commit to writing my book. Now to accomplish the best timing for my writing to occur . . . morning? evening?

I look forward to all the possibilities that moving to the country holds for us. It has been super fantastic for William and Joseph. Every nice day, they spend large chunks of time outside, exploring, creating, living. So much of what we desire must wait until the old house sells. It’s not even on the market yet . . . yikes! I’ve finally hired a painter to get it all painted after realizing it is totally unreasonable to think myself, or even with at least two children helping at all times, it will get done. It just won’t. There’s still so much to do outside of that. I tell ya, seven years of living with seven children and seven pets does its damage 🙂

Here is a picture of the new place with an attempt at a Christmas letter family picture. Now that Eric is home (having come home about a week before Christmas from off his mission on medical leave), I need to redo it and try to do better.

In this contemporary world, treating sexual issues (cialis online) browse around now has been always a serious matter.

It is a log home, obviously, on 15 acres. It provides the best of both worlds. My hubby wanted seclusion, and it doesn’t get better than this! We are completely surrounded by woods and we are at the end of a right of way, so absolutely no cars come past us at all since there is no public road for about a mile. I wanted to still be near everything that I have become accustomed to as a surburbia homeschooling dweller, and this is 5 minutes from a major interstate, a business highway and a good size city. Beat that!

It’s only 15 minutes from our old place as well so I didn’t have to switch doctors, dentists, shopping, churches, or friends. And, after almost a month of living in it, we all absolutely loved it the moment we stepped foot inside. I feel freer than I have in a very long time. Peace.

I guess I won’t spill everything out in one blog post. I’ll try to update everyone as time goes on. Hopefully, it will keep me active this year blogging. I’ve loved having my thoughts, ideas, and perspectives all in one handy location to reference again and again. I’ve begun printing it out as a type of journal. It’s all good.

I end by absolutely recognizing the Lord’s hand in our lives and the many blessings we enjoy each and every day. I just feel very grateful. I wish peace and joy to each and every one of you! See you in 2008!

2 Comments

Posted in Beginnings, Family

Changes Forever?

Posted on January 14, 2007 | 5 comments

My hubby and I are about to leave later today to bring our oldest, firstborn son out West to serve as a full-time missionary for two years in declaring the good news to those in the northern Utah, southern Idaho, and Star Valley, Wyoming areas that the gospel of Jesus Christ has been restored to the earth. He will be a representative of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, and we believe our church is set up in the same manner that Jesus Christ established His church when He was living upon the earth as a mortal. We have the same establishment such as prophets, aspostles, temples, the proper authority to act in God’s name through His Holy Priesthood, the sealing powers (as stated in Matthew), faith and works, baptism by immersion, repentance, the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of hands, etc. We believe that the Lord is the same today, yesterday and forever, which means that He has always had His people record words under His inspiration and that we have been blessed with another testament of Jesus Christ, the Book of Mormon, and that He knows where all His people are. (We believe there is yet additional scripture if and when we are ready to receive it, by living up to what we already have.) The greatest news is that Jesus Christ is our Savior and the Redeemer of the world. Our son is part of the great work in fulfilling the prophecy that every knee shall bow and every tongue confess that Jesus is the Christ. This is one reason why there are missionaries from our church all over the world, including here in our own backyard!

Our son leaving for two years is both an exciting time for our family, and a sad one. I think back when my hubby and I were dating as seniors in high school. Upon graduation and after summer completed, I was to begin college about an hour away as he waited to serve his own mission (he ended up going to the Concepcion, Chile, South America mission). I would stay in the dorms at college Monday through Thursday, and come back for the long weekend until he left. My mother and sister were driving me there that first week, and we went to my future-hubby’s house to say good-bye.

As my mother pulled away with me in the car, my hubby and I began to cry. My mother declared, “Well, my goodness! It’s only four days! It’s as if you won’t see each other again.” My hubby and I locked eyes, and we knew it had nothing to do with the four day separation and everything to do that we both understood, without speaking any words, that our lives were about to change forever. It was time to enter the next phase of our lives. We were both excited and sad, just as we are now with our son. With our first child leaving home, we will no longer be the family that all lives under one roof as a parent/child dynamic. I suspect that it will never go back to that again.

I have such fond memories of our family-growing-up-together times as one whole unit. As a mother, it is easy to flash back to all the stages, some more favored in my mind than others. At the same time, I am eager to see and observe all that my son will learn and grow from this next stage of life for him. Eric is eager to learn how this experience will shape him. I know he has his own mixed feelings of being anxious and being sad, but ready.

It’s ironic that we were able to seal our two little boys, who are adopted, to us as a family in the Raleigh Temple a couple of weeks ago. We believe that the family unit continues into eternity; therefore, we are married for time and all eternity versus till death do you part. As part of this sealing, any children born to us after being sealed together in the temple for eternity as a couple are also automatically sealed to us as a family. If an adoption occurs, you must specifically seal them to us by going to the temple for that opportunity and blessing. So, for five years, we have operated as an “incomplete family”, but now we are once again a forever family. And now, we bid one adieu as he forges his own life away from us. It’s bittersweet, but we, too, are ready for all that it brings our family!
Get More Information viagra ordination Good news is that Kamagra is cheaper than its alternatives.

It looks like it’s snowing, but it’s not, though it was bitter cold. We lost a lot of our pictures, and this is the one I found, and it ended up with splatters on it: